The Cahoon Run Down: Late RAW Review, 9.24.12

Hey everybody, Geddy Cahoon here with a somewhat delayed article for your viewing pleasure. There is, as always, a little (Lot of) backstory behind today’s piece. Obviously over the past few weeks, my writing has faltered a bit and I’ve moved to an “Every other week” sort of schedule. With school and my interest in the product not what it was a few months ago, it’s harder to bring myself to devote 2 hours to writing every single week. This week, I was actually even sort of contemplating going on a hiatus of sorts. However, I got some upsetting news. One of my fellow writers Adam Behan, whom I consider a quite good friend in a sense, is extremely ill. As such, he will be indefinitely unable to continue with his weekly RAW reviews. I figured it was time for me to step up to the plate. Each week for an unspecified amount of time, I’ll be reviewing Monday Night RAW. On top of being about covering for a friend, this is also good for me because it’ll force me to pay more attention to the product and perhaps become more interested in it.

For the most part (Again due to school) these things will go up on Tuesday afternoons. With all of this technical crap ironed out, let’s dive into my late review of this past Monday’s RAW!

NOTE: These articles will be written in Adam’s own “Like or Hate” format)

Opening Segment: Not really sure how I feel about this segment. Obviously, CM Punk and Paul Heyman are golden separate, and together they’re untouchable. I don’t think Brad Maddox was that bad either, honestly. He did okay with his lines. Maybe sounding a little labored at times, but he did the job. What I dislike is the fact that the main event storyline of WWE right now is a parody of a real issue in the NFL. I have no inherent issue with parody storylines or things of that nature, but when you inject this into a main event level angle it just rubs me wrong. I also hate anything that AJ gets involved in, but this may be the beginning of the end of her tenure as GM, so that I’m okay with. This honestly seemed like sort of a placeholder opening segment since Cena wouldn’t be appearing until later in the show. It didn’t really do anything other than establish what we already know: Punk is angry, AJ sucks. The little backstage segment afterwards with AJ was irritating as well.

Like or Hate: Gotta go with Hate, since the negatives here do seem to outweigh the positives, but it was overall a benign segment.

Ziggler vs. Kingston: We’ve seen these guys wrestle so many times over the past 2 and a half years that I can’t really be anything but apathetic towards this match. It was a competent bout from a technical standpoint, but what do you expect with these two? Ziggler picking up the victory is good I suppose, but it would be better if he would be winning his matches on PPVs and stuff as well. What I really took away from this match is how much I want R-Truth to be a heel again. I love the guy, but I want him to not be a sucky face. Also, Dolph and Vickie need to split. Dolph is a pretty terrible talker, but having Vickie with him for this long doesn’t really give him a chance to improve those already lackluster skills. Plus they’re just annoying together at this point.

Like or Hate: Even though the match was okay, I think I have to Hate.

Kane and Bryan Segment: Who would’ve thought that a tag team would be WWE’s main attraction in 2012? I’m enjoying it, and I think a lot of others are too. Bryan and Kane have this strange, awesome chemistry, and these segments are actually pretty hysterical. Dr. Shelby is doing a great job in his role (“That’s not even grammatically correct” was my line of the night), and these segments are going to be a part of RAW for the foreseeable future, so I hope you’re enjoying them. I have no inherent issue with them, but I could see them getting annoying. Until they do get aggravating, I’m prepared to keep enjoying Team Hell No and Dr. Shelby’s adventures.

Like or Hate: It’s Daniel Bryan, how could I not Like?

Prime Time Players vs. Santino and Ryder: This match was kind of a joke, but obviously the point was to put over the Prime Time Players, which I’m always on board with. Plus, the guys they were squashing were Santino and my mortal enemy Zack Ryder, which just makes it even sweeter. Here’s hoping that a title run is on PTP’s horizon.

Like or Hate: Normally a match of this length would be a “Hate,” but I love PTP. So Like.

Punk and Foley Verbally Duke it Out: This was a pretty phenomenal segment. I love Mick Foley, as most everyone does, and the emotion he displayed here was spot-on and really gave the segment a more intense and meaningful feel. I’m obviously loving Punk’s new angry, self-obsessed character, and the argument about statistics and the meaningfulness of length vs. impression a title reign makes could actually end up being a fairly controversial, real debate. The only thing I didn’t like was the fact that Foley’s whole speech amounted to “Hey you should fight Cena again.” Otherwise, it was a solid segment.

Like or Hate: Of course it’s a Like.

Ryback vs. The Miz: Call me crazy, but I actually thought that this was a solid little match. I’ve really been enjoying Ryback recently (I loved Skip Sheffield) and obviously The Miz does good work. I get that Ryback’s winning streak needs to continue, but I don’t necessarily think he should be burying one of our midcard champions just yet. At any rate, I enjoyed this match and I very much enjoyed that fan run in. Why would you run in during a Ryback match, of all matches? Dude’s like a shaved gorilla who throws couches around.

Like or Hate: Like. I’ve really been warming up to Ryback recently.

Kane and Bryan Slap Tables: This was definitely a much more insane segment with Kane and Bryan, but it was a little bit funnier. There’s not much to say here. I feel like I’d only be re-writing what I typed earlier in the review.

Like or Hate: Like I suppose.

Wade Barrett vs. Tyson Kidd: I love Wade Barrett. Always have, always will. But I don’t love him burying random jobbers. Everyone already knows his name. Plus his new finisher is unbelievably aggravating. Overall these segments feel like they’re a waste of my time.

Like or Hate: Hate. Get Wade a feud please.

The Jerry Lawler Interview: I expressed a few weeks back how as much as I loathe Jerry Lawler’s onscreen character, I was terrified when he had his heart attack, and filled with relief when he started his recovery. This interview was a good way to show everyone that he’s okay, and he’ll be back sooner rather than later. Apparently he won’t be back full time until early 2013 or something like that, but it’s nice to see that The King is still kicking.

Like or Hate: Like of course.

Otunga, Ricardo, and Del Rio vs. Sheamus, Cara, and Mysterio: I don’t think anyone would kill me if I admit I just completely ignored this match and didn’t watch it. I’m sure it was decent from a technical standpoint. I literally could not possibly care any less about any of these guys. I enjoy Otunga, but that’s it. He should not be involved in the Heavyweight title picture. And why have Ricardo wrestle? I mean, he CAN wrestle, but you could’ve put anybody on the team. I don’t care who won or what happens or whatever. Sheamus isn’t even SmackDown’s top guy anymore. The World Title is so secondary and it’s sad.

Like or Hate: Can’t make a full ruling since I didn’t watch. But Hate.

Another Kane Bryan Segment: Recounting these is getting annoying. Next week I’m reviewing them all at once instead of jumping from segment to segment. Bryan pukes. It’s okay.

Like or Hate: Meh. Like I guess.

The Rhodes Scholars Make the Scene: As much as I would’ve loved Kane and Bryan to be Team Teamwork, Team Hell No is a pretty decent name. But let’s get into the big thing here: Sandow and Rhodes forming a tag team. If you know me, you would think I would be freaking out over the awesomeness of this. I am. The kicking Kane and Bryan’s asses is awesome and makes them seem like a force to be reckoned with. But the realist in me knows that this probably won’t end well. WWE always ends up burying one guy when these teams split up, and I don’t want either of these guys buried. They’re two of my top three wrestlers today, and I want them both to flourish. They have great chemistry, the name is kickass, and they’ll probably be tag champs eventually. For now I’ll ride it out and be happy with the fact that two of my absolute favorite wrestlers are teaming up, but if Sandow ends up getting buried here… Let’s just say I’ll be upset.

Like or Hate: Apprehension aside, gotta Like. Maybe Love even.

Divas vs. Divas: Some Divas went at it in a tag match. Two divas won, two lost. Then Eve beat up Beth Phoenix. Yawn.

Like or Hate: YAWN

Brodus Clay vs. Tensai: I enjoy both of these guys in theory, but this match was hampered by it only being 25 seconds long and then ruined by the returning Big Show. He doesn’t need to be reestablished. Everybody knows Show. Tensai’s been in the dog house for a while and I hope that changes soon.

Like or Hate: Hate.

Punk and Cena Promo: This was honestly a fairly decent way to end the show. Punk’s counting was awesome, but Cena hitting Punk with a freaking lead pipe is a little bit ridiculous. I get that his arm is in a sling, but he’s supposed to be the face of the WWE and a role model. The message tonight was “Hit your enemies with blunt objects if they make snide comments at your expense.” Punk beating up the beloved Foley is a good way to make him even more hated and was kind of expected. I really don’t know what to think about the Ryback appearance. It would be cool to see him get a title shot, but it’s something of a rush job. Build him a little bit more, give him a midcard belt or two, then toss him in the main event picture. At any rate, next week’s RAW should be interesting.

Like or Hate: Like, I suppose.

Overall, this week’s RAW gets a 5/10. It wasn’t a horrible show, and there were some great elements to it. But overall every show is just hampered by the 3 hour time slot. I have a feeling that reviewing RAW each week is going to be somewhat painful, but I’m a commitment guy.

Be sure to email me ( and friend me on Facebook (Nodq Geddy Cahoon) to talk wrestling, articles and whatever. Until next time, thanks for reading, and get well Adam!