The Cahoon Run Down: Why Do I Love Ryback?

Hey everybody, Geddy Cahoon here with the first edition of The Cahoon Run Down in over 3 MONTHS. I don’t really have any kind of explanation for my absence – Let’s just say school and my personal life overwhelmed my desire to write. But you’re not here for excuses – You’re here to hear me get all verbose and ranty about the world of professional wrestling. Today, there’s one man I want to talk about in the wrestling world. No, it’s not the love of my life Damien Sandow, nor is it his equally stunning partner Cody Rhodes. Today I want to talk about RYBACK.

More specifically, I want to talk about/try to figure out why I love Ryback so much. Because I really do love him, a lot. He’s freaking awesome, and definitely one of the things I look forward to on RAW each week. This is disturbingly out of character for me. If you’re a regular reader of my work, you know that I am a guy who is big on heels. You’ll usually hear me complaining about the stupidity and illogical nature of WWE’s top faces. So what makes Ryback any different? Let’s figure it out.

I think one of the reasons I enjoy Ryback is the soft spot I hold for Skip Sheffield. I was always a big fan of Sheffield when the Nexus was around all those years ago, and I was really disappointed when he hurt his ankle. It’s pretty cool to see him back in this radically different role, and getting an amazing reaction from the crowd at that. He’s basically playing the same character as Skip Sheffield – A jacked up dude who decimates people. Only difference is, this time he’s way more jacked up and the crowd is cheering him. At the end of the day, what’s not to like about a guy who kicks ass and doesn’t even bother to ask questions later? Worked for Steve Austin.

Ryback’s look is also a big component of why I dig him. The weird thing about that is that I don’t even like his look that much, per se. It’s honestly pretty ridiculous. His singlet features probably the worst design in the history of pro-wrestling – It’s always either a robot skeleton or a big “R.” But something about it just works. It might be that bald guys are naturally badass, it might be that beards are badass, but I think it’s really his size. Vince is notorious amongst smarks for always being higher on the super muscley dudes, regardless of their wrestling ability. The thing about Ryback is that his size is so intimidating that it just makes him look awesome. The guy is like a pile of muscles, and he’s a legitimately fear-striking, awe-inspiring figure. I’m also a real sucker for things that are “So bad they’re good,” and Ryback’s aforementioned singlet is definitely an example of that.

The crowd energy that Ryback creates is also phenomenal. It’s hard not to get behind the guy when he’s got an entire stadium chanting “Feed me more.” I believe that the reaction the audience gives him is evidence of how over the guy is – Even the smarks don’t hate him, for the most part. With a guy like Cena, all of the “smart fans” hate him, and they’ll let you know it. The reaction Ryback breeds is so genuine and raw that it’s hard not to get pumped up along with him.

The biggest complaints one could really levy against Ryback are his mic skills and his in-ring ability, two things we haven’t seen much of, which is odd for a main event player. His mic work is a bit spotty, but I think he’s improving. He paces himself in a really odd manner, but I think it works with the frankly weird, intense character that he’s playing. The big elephant in the room is Ryback’s perceived in-ring ability, or lack thereof. His matches are never long and he rarely sells moves. The thing about that though is that again, it works with his character and it really doesn’t bother me as much as you’d think it would.

Ryback is just cool and energetic enough that it’s okay that all he does is throw guys around and not react to being hit. We all saw at TLC last weekend that the guy can fucking deliver when it comes right down to it. Over time, I know his in-ring ability will become more complex and his repertoire will increase in size. Ryback is entertaining enough that I’m more than willing to wait, however it long it may take, for that time to come.
All I can really say is that Ryback very organically grew on everybody, me included. It’s really strange as he does sort of embody everything the internet hates about wrestling. But sometimes you sort of have to sit back and accept the fact that something works, ridiculous as it may be.

One last thing, unrelated to Ryback. We all know that the last 3 months were not exactly productive for me. The way I went about taking my sabbatical was admittedly unprofessional, and I really do apologize all of my readers and internet colleagues for not being more formal about my lack of interest in writing. However, most of those aforementioned colleagues had the decency to NOT delete my account from their websites just because my turnout decreased. didn’t.

I went to sign on tonight, and my account had been deleted. I’m fine with that in theory – The issue is that many articles I wrote were written prior to me joining 3 other websites, and thus existed only on NoDQ’s servers. By deleting my account, a significant chunk of my body of work was deleted as well. All because I took a break from ranting about wrestling on the internet.
That’s fair.

Anyway, I can’t promise that I will return to writing weekly articles – I’m too busy these days. But I will promise this: Whenever I can or whenever I feel the spark, I will try to write something. And if I ever decide to pack it in for good, you guys will definitely know.

That’s it for this week – Be sure to shoot me an email ( or friend me on Facebook (Geddy Cahoon QWN) if you wanna talk articles or wrestling! Thanks for reading and it’s great to be back.