The Cahoon Run Down: CM Punk Can Never Turn Heel

Hey everybody, Geddy Cahoon here with another edition of The Cahoon Run Down. This week, as opposed to the last few, there were multiple topics I figured I could choose from to write a decent, well-thought out article about. I tossed around ideas, ranging from the release of A.W., to Daniel Bryan being the most over under-carder in the company, to Sheamus being the least effective Heavyweight champ possibly ever. Instead, I decided to go with a topic I know very well, that I’ve covered before: CM Punk.

Ah CM Punk. Is there any name that causes the collective Internet Wrestling Community to release such sounds of joy? Well, maybe Daniel Bryan. Anyway, there’s no denying the popularity and indeed, talent, of Philip Brooks. He’s one of the few guys who’s loved by everyone, but isn’t overrated in the least. For a while, however, CM Punk really faltered in the WWE. He was massively entertaining, sure. But he wasn’t used correctly. At all. Sure he held a few championships, but he would always fall off the radar afterwards, regardless of how effective his title reign was. The character he was playing were pretty much entertaining without fail. From the obnoxious anti-drug wrestler feuding with Jeff Hardy, to the messianic maniac with a pathetic, ineffective stable (Two pathetic, ineffective stables actually – Nexus and S.E.S.), Punk could win the smarter fans over, and was consistently great at what he did.

Basically, Punk went through a slew of entertaining personas and potentially breakthrough storylines, but never really found his spot. In the Summer of 2011 however, Punk finally got his due. In arguably one of the greatest storylines ever (Indisputably the greatest angle of the “PG Era” or whatever you wanna call it), Punk broke kayfabe, harpooning the WWE and some of its ridiculous policies. His mic work here was better than ever, and the fans really got behind what he was saying. It should say something about every fan’s love/hate relationship with the WWE that we wanted this Punk guy to leave the company with the title. Anyway, CM Punk actually went over the undefeatable John Cena and got his main event spot. After that awesome storyline however… Punk really faltered. He got boring, he got stale, he got repetitive. His mic work and in-ring work were still good, but he was doing his best with frankly awful material. I’m sure I’m not the only Punk fan who got really sick of him over the past 10 months – It’s nice to see him at the top, but “Top Face” CM Punk isn’t the same CM Punk from MiTB 2011.

Alright, so we (Or I at least) have basically had to suffer through an annoying, watered down version of one of our most beloved superstars over the course of the last year. On the unbelievably lackluster RAW 1000, however, something potentially great happened: CM Punk walked out on John Cena getting an ass-kicking from the Big Show, and then laid out The freaking ROCK of all people! RAW 1000 went off the air with CM Punk angrily leaving the ring to a chorus of boos. I rejoiced, as many others on the internet did, at the idea of Punk returning to his much more entertaining roots and becoming a heel once again.

Unfortunately… It didn’t really happen. Someone on the QuickWrestlingRegime Facebook page commented, “If anything he turned tweener.” I disagreed at first, but unfortunately that person was right. Punk has definitely been slightly more entertaining in the past few weeks, but it’s because he’s showing snippets of his heel persona. I don’t think I’m alone however, in NOT JUST WANTING SNIPPETS. I want to not have to roll my eyes at CM Punk anymore. It’s definitely getting there, but I’ve always said that since Punk turned face last year, he’s just John Cena with tattoos. And because of that, he’s not truly or fully being turned heel. And that’s unbelievably fucking aggravating.

It’s basically like WWE wants to sate the internet fans who are becoming fed up with him, but at the same time, he’s too valuable to fully be a bad guy again. I think we all wanted Punk to get this big, but unfortunately, WWE is basically saying that we can’t have him back. Now he’s an asset as a face, and guys who are assets as faces don’t often return to the dark side. And that’s a damn shame, because I want to be able to LOVE CM Punk again, not just like him.

That’s it for this week! Post your comments, thoughts and opinions below! Send me an email ( or friend me on Facebook (Nodq Geddy Cahoon) to tell me what you thought and talk wrestling, articles or whatever. Be sure to check out my youtube channel WrestlingBreakDown, as well as my non-wrestling website Nerd World Country. Until next time, thanks for reading!

  • Major Fury

    I disagree a little. I think he’s doing a slow turn and not an abrupt turn that has become the natural thing to do as of late. He’s not as big as Cena where Cena won’t turn heel because of the kids and the make a wish foundation and Cena is still the face of the company. So that’s why I think he’s on a slow turn.

  • Jockstrap

    No it’s because all of the internet claimed he made a “heel turn.” But he never did. Shit, his whole pipebomb segment was about him talking shit on everyone in the company and being a “heel.” And that made him popular. So now making him do “heel” stuff isn’t gonna make the fans turn on him.
    He is indeed, a Tweener.