Over the Limit 2011 Review
-In a classy move, this show is dedicated to the memory of Randy Savage.
-R-Truth kicks us off with a pretty funny promo screaming injustice because he had to park in the lot with the great unwashed crowd.
R-Truth vs. Rey Mysterio
Truth acts like a bully to start but gets low-bridged and ends up on the outside so Rey comes off the apron with flying headscissors. Truth has smartly changed his jeans to say “shut up” instead of “what’s up”…the little things matter. Truth dumps Rey from the top and runs him into the ring post for two. We hit a front facelock to call some spots and Rey makes a false comeback and gets caught with a Falcon Arrow for two.
Truth stretched Rey Rey around the ring post for some punishment and they head up top but Mysterio brings him off with a bulldog for two in a nice spot. Mysterio makes the babyface comeback with a spingboard cross body for two and adds a kick to the head for two. You see, if you slap your thigh when you kick someone, it’s more powerful.
Rey hits a seated senton from the top but Truth basically no-sells it and hits a corkscrew elbow for two. The Axe Kick misses though and and Truth has to take a powder to avoid the 619. While Rey is busy prepping a moonsault, Truth yanks him out and crotches him on the apron. Back inside, Truth hits the Shut Up for the surprise pin and the upset.
Winner: R-Truth
-Definitely an upset here and a sign that WWE is serious about the Truth push…good opener too **3/4. They have to make sure they keep giving Truth mic time because that’s where he shines the most, you have to play up his strengths.
-Truth hits Rey Rey in the head with a water bottle because he’s EVIL!
Intercontinental Title
Wade Barrett vs. Ezekiel Jackson
Doesn’t a stable have to be over before people care about the members fighting with each other? Just wondering. Barrett attacks but gets overpowered so he resorts to cowering but even that is not enough to stop the POWER OF BIG ZEKE. Punchy-kicky-punchy-kicky. Barrett hits the floor again and runs away but even the old trick of suckering a face into chasing the heel into the ring doesn’t work. More punching in the corner leads to an elbow drop for two for Zeke.
Hey, look, more kicking! Elbow by Jackson leads to more cowering from Barrett but IT’S A SWERVE and Wade runs his shoulder into the ring post. Barrett adds a kick to Jackson’s Shar Pei head while it’s against the post and that only gets two. Flying elbow from the second rope gets another near fall and we hit the chinlock to keep up the breathtaking pace.
Jackson fights out of Wasteland but Barrett catches him with a kick and hits a pumphandle slam for two. A punch (surprised?) sends Barrett to the apron and Jackson brings him back in for a babyface comeback to absolutely ZERO reaction from the live crowd. Splash in the corner leads to repeated bodyslams…is there seriously a more basic move? I mean, they do them on Tough Enough every single week. Jackson looks to finish, so the Corrrrrrrrrrre runs in for the cheap DQ ending.
Winner by DQ: Ezekiel Jackson
-I really hate cheap DQ endings on PPVs, this isn’t 1998 WCW, is it? The Corrrrrrrrrre beat down Jackson afterwards and Booker T shoots for the “he’s a winner in the eyes of all these fans” angle that really doesn’t mean anything.
-Call the thing * for one or two good spots but all the punching and kicking at the beginning put me to sleep.
-Meanwhile, CM Punk and Mason Ryan find out that the rest of their Nexus cohorts have been beaten down. Punk is so good as a heel, it’s a crime he’s not a main event guy.
Sin Cara vs. Chavo Guerrero
The crowd is dead silent for entrances of both guys, which is not a good sign for Mr. Cara. WWE decides to light up the ring in a strange yellow hue for whatever reason. Chavo works a hammerlock but Cara flips out and they go into some classic lucha spots which result in Guerrero being on the floor. Cara comes flying out with a spinning plancha and counters a backdrop with flying headscissors off the apron.
Back inside, Chavo catches Cara and hammers away in the corner but Cara goes low with a dropkick and hits a nice moonsault from the top for two. Sin Cara definitely forgets the next spot and wanders around the ring for a second before realizing his error and Chavo takes over. Cara quickly stops the rally with a dropkick and he gets a sloppy springboard armdrag. Cara runs into a kick to the gut and Chavo begins to work on the knee to slow him down.
Sin Cara catches Chavo heading up top with a kick to the outside and Cara follows with a splash from the top, which injures Guerrero’s knee. Springboard headscissors put Chavo down and a handspring elbow sets up a springboard body press for two. Chavo takes over and looks for the Gory Special but Cara escapes and they REALLY screw up the finish, which was supposed to be Cara flipping into his finisher. However, it was so screwed up it ended up looking like a terrible flying headscissors. When something like that happens, you should definitely improvise a new finish but that gets the pin anyways. Yikes.
Winner: Sin Cara
-Look, I know Sin Cara can work, I’ve seen it. However, he missed a couple spots tonight AND blew the finish right on camera…not good sir, not good at all. If you’re going to do a spotfest lucha match, you better make sure you hit the spots **1/4.
-Backstage, Christian and Randy Orton verbally spar over the benefits and negatives of Universal Health Care in a capitalistic society. Whoops, I mean they threaten to kick each other’s asses and win the title.
-Alberto Del Rio decides to class up this broadcast a little bit and make his presence known. He declares that this country has a major immigration problem and it’s all those filthy CANADIANS coming across the border illegally. Big heat for that one. How did the camera find two goofs in Vancouver jerseys AND a skank wearing only a bikini top to a WWE event…in SEATTLE?!?! The director must have thought he struck gold.
WWE Tag Team Titles
Kane & Big Show vs. CM Punk & Mason Ryan
Punk has “Macho” written on his wrist tape in a nice tribute to the legend. Ryan overpowers Kane to kick things off and slams him before bringing in Punk, who instantly gets destroyed. Big Show chops away in the corner and, in a cute spot, when Punk turns his back to Show, he gets chopped there as well. Finally, Punk goes low with a dropkick and tags in Ryan to save him briefly before tagging back in and getting trapped in a bearhug. Kane comes in with a big boot and a side slam gets two. Clothesline off the top has Kane looking to finish things but Ryan distracts the referee and that allows Punk to get a cheap shot and tag in Batista…I mean, Mason Ryan.
Kane plays the Ricky Morton role in this match and gets trapped in the heel corner while Punk shows off his awesome heel mannerisms. Ryan gets an Oklahoma Slam on Kane for two while Booker T confuses Kane with the Big Show…easy to do that, sure. Kane slips out of a slam attempt and gets a suplex for the double KO but Punk cuts off Kane before he can get to his partner.
Punk heads up top for another Macho Man tribute, a flying elbow, but takes too long and Kane gets the hot tag to the Big Show. He cleans house on Mason Ryan and Kane gets rid of CM Punk over the top rope. Ryan turns around, walks into a double chokeslam from the champions and that’s all she wrote.
Winners and STILL Champions: Kane & Big Show
-You know, for supposedly being this big heel group, Nexus sure jobs an awful lot. Punk is being absolutely WASTED in his current role as he could easily be the #1 heel in the promotion if they would let him. But no, we need more Randy Orton and Miz. The match actually was energetic and fun, so call it **3/4 for some good stuff.
-A REALLY stupid and unfunny fake Presidential press conference announcing the Capital Punishment PPV wastes some time.
Diva’s Title
Brie Bella vs. Kelly Kelly
Please keep it short. Kelly catches Brie in a tarantula-type move in the ropes then comes off the top with a high cross body for two. Kelly stays on her with a…STINK FACE? Really? There’s one move I’d LOVE to be on the receiving end of. A Nikki cheapshot turns the tide and Brie necksnaps her for two. Brie works the arm but I must clarify that “working the arm” means “bending the arm in a way that looks like it could possibly hurt while making funny faces.” Please don’t confuse anything I am describing here with actual wrestling…thank you. Kelly makes the comeback with a really bad Thesz Press and lots of hair pulling for two. The referee does his normal “I’m a moron” spot and the twins switch, allowing Nikki to hit a facebuster for the win.
Winner and STILL Champion: Brie Bella
-Wow, I haven’t seen this finish 4853 times before this match, so it must be original, right? The crowd was absolutely dead for everything that wasn’t Kelly Kelly’s exposed skin 1/2*.
World Heavyweight Title
Randy Orton vs. Christian
These two REALLY need to have a good match because this has been a pretty crappy pay-per-view so far.
Nice crowd reaction to start and Christian tries to win early but Orton works a headlock. Nice, basic sequence leads to Christian hitting a missile dropkick from the second rope for two but he runs into an elbow off a leapfrog from Orton. Christian recovers and dumps Randy to the outside before following with a dropkick but no brawling results, unfortunately.
Back in, we hit the chinlock to keep Christian in control but Orton fights out and gets a standing dropkick. It has no effect though, as both guys head up top and Orton brings him down the hard way with a superplex from the very top…ouch but it only gets two. Orton hits a series of European uppercuts but Christian catches him with a backslide for two.
Orton tries to regain control but Christian catches him with a spinebuster for two…is he trying to impress HHH or something? They have the patented Yay-Boo Slugfest, won by Christian, and a reverse DDT gets two. Christian heads up top for a missile dropkick but Orton catches his legs a la Bret Hart and it turns into a pinfall reversal sequence…very nice.
Christian gets trapped on the apron but escapes the Hangman’s DDT and necksnaps Orton down. A flying headbutt from the top gets another near fall for the challenger. Orton recovers though and hits his backbreaker for two but now he’s pissed and it’s time for the GARVIN STOMP…for two.
Christian fights to his feet and they exchange finishers but Orton catches him in a very cool submission, the reverse Boston Crab…don’t see that everyday. Christian recovers and heads up top and, in a VERY cool spot, he remembers how he lost the title and head-fakes Orton, getting him to commit to an RKO before hitting him with a sunset flip for two. Now THAT’S psychology.
Christian tries his kick in the corner but Orton catches him and hits the Hangman’s DDT for two. Randy looks to finish but Christian counters the RKO and looks for the spear but Orton sees it coming and catches him with a powerslam for a close two count. Now, Orton is really pissed and preps the PUNT OF CERTAIN DEATH but briefly has second thoughts. This allows Christian a second to recover and hit the SPEAR! SPEAR! SPEAR!…for two.
They exchange finishers one more but Orton is just one step ahead of Christian and hits an RKO to put him down for the pin and the title.
Winner and STILL Champion: Randy Orton
-I know the internet fans are going to be pissed off but this was a really good match that really showed Christian can hang in the main event if he’s given a chance. They do the HANDSHAKE OF DOOM afterwards but the seeds are definitely planted for a Christian heel turn. If that’s the direction they are going, it makes sense for him to lose here but let’s hope the creative team doesn’t forget about it.
-I don’t know if it’s a show-saving match but it was a great match ****1/4.
Kiss My Foot Match
Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole
Wow, the last time I watched a Kiss My Foot Match, I was 10 years old. You know, I was all about the Cole storyline in the beginning but this whole thing has gone on long enough.
Michael Cole hits the ring in a suit with a note from his “doctor” proclaiming that he is medically unfit to compete. The referee (who we are not allowed to name because Vince McMahon thinks referees shouldn’t have names) tears up the note and rings the bell. Lawler kicks his ass and rips of his suit but this is not a Tuxedo Match, so the bout has to continue.
A dropkick sends Cole to the outside where he somehow manages to turns the tide and send Lawler weakly into the ring barrier. Cole tries to get Lawler to kiss his foot but gets tossed through the Cole Mine and appears to be dead. Back inside, Lawler PULLS DOWN THE STRAP and drops the fist from the top rope, which is obviously enough for the pin.
Winner: Jerry Lawler
-As JR would say, we never advertised a classic, DUD.
-Anyways, Lawler calls out Eve, who hits her moonsault on Cole as retribution for all the nasty things he said about women’s wrestling. That’s actually the one thing Cole did that I agreed with.
Speaking of Jim Ross, he also gets his revenge by dumping a bottle of BBQ sauce all over Cole’s broken body. Cole heads for the hills and proclaims that he will NEVER kiss Lawler’s foot. Those are famous last words as BRET HART makes a surprise appearance to ensure that justice is done by applying a Sharpshooter to Cole and Lawler makes Cole kiss his foot. Hopefully folks, that’s your blowoff. I really don’t want to sit through any more Cole vs. King “mat classics.”
-Hype video sets up the main event.
I Quit Match for the WWE Title
John Cena vs. The Miz
I’m probably not going out on a limb here by saying I don’t like the Miz’s odds tonight. Jim Ross is announcing the main event, so at least we know the main announcer will try to get the match over and not himself. The Miz helpfully recaps the rules of an I Quit match for us but then announces this is essentially a handicap match since there are no DQs and Alex Riley can do whatever he wants.
Of course, our hero says no and cleans house on the heels to start. Gutwrench suplex leads to Cena locking in the STF on Miz but Riley breaks it up right away and the beatdown starts. Cena manages to dump Riley to the outside and the SOS Comeback on Miz sets up an Attitude Adjustment but Miz counters and hits a neckbreaker. Skull Crushing Finale is countered to an Attitude Adjustment but Riley returns and beats the hell out of him with the steel briefcase. Of course, John Cena WILL NOT DIE.
To the outside, Cena gets rammed into the ring barrier but even that colossal fall isn’t enough to kill John Cena. Miz preps the announce table which isn’t even fair because JR doesn’t speak Spanish. The heels beat him down with the monitors which makes me think, why hasn’t Vince moved on to the flatscreen monitors? Do we still need those giant ones that look like they weight 60 lbs. and have the picture quality of a 1988 camcorder?
Anyways, Cena makes a brief comeback but Miz stops him and DDTs him on the ring steps in a spot that should put a normal wrestler out for months. However, John Cena WILL NOT DIE! Miz offers him a chance to quit before Riley slams the ring steps on him but he says no both before and after the steps are dropped…MOVE OVER SUPERMAN, THERE’S A NEW SHERIFF IN TOWN!!!
Yet again, Miz offers Cena the chance to quit before he beats the hell out of him with a kendo stick, Cena responds by questioning the Miz’s sexuality. Needless to say, the Miz does not hold back when beating him with the weapon and leaves Cena’s chest and stomach covered with welts….holy hell.
The heels drag Cena up the aisle and slam him on the entrance ramp before Miz adds a suplex on the stage. Strangely enough, the crowd isn’t even chanting for Cena or anything, they are just quiet and seemingly waiting for something to happen. Miz kicks Cena in the head, sending him tumbling off the stage and to the floor below. Cena is selling that he is delirious and starting to not realize where he is.
Miz grabs a belt from a crew member and again offers Cena the chance to save himself pain but Cena tells him to stick it. John does his best Kunta Kinte impression by refusing to cry out in pain while he’s getting beaten and refuses to quit. Miz and Riley piddle around a bit, allowing Cena to make a brief comeback but a steel chair ends that.
Back in the ring, Cena again makes a comeback and the referee gets bumped (in an I Quit match!?!?) but Miz stops him with a DDT. Miz sets up a steel chair against the ropes and hits Cena with a Skull Crushing Finale, which had Cena landing awkwardly on the chair but (say it with me) JOHN CENA WILL…NOT…DIE!!
Since Cena won’t quit, Miz goes and berates a 12 year old fan plant to try to convince Cena to quit but the 12 year old WILL NOT DIE!! The heels wedge Cena in some sort of ring barrier and Miz threatens to beat him in the head with a steel chair until he quits but again, he refuses.
Miz smacks him in the head with the chair and Cena is out cold. Since it’s been more than 10 years, they rehash the angle from Royal Rumble 1999 and play a recording on Riley’s cell phone of Cena screaming “I Quit!” This time though, the referee isn’t a complete moron and he restarts the match. Talk about overbooked.
Of course, this is just the opening Cena needs and he gets rid of Riley by giving him an Attitude Adjustment through the announce table. It’s also time for payback, as he takes off his belt and whips the Miz all the way up the entrance ramp. As soon as they get up there, Cena locks on the STF and Miz immediately quits to keep the title on Cena.
Winner and STILL Champion: John Cena
-I know what they were going for with the booking, wanting the crowd to get louder and louder as Cena got beat harder but it just didn’t click for whatever reason. Plus, the false finish made the announcers look really stupid since they instantly bought it even though it was an obvious recording.
So what happens to the Miz from here? He just basically had a handicap match for the world title with no rules and blew it. I’d say he’s about to get shunted down to the midcard for a bit and it’s Alberto Del Rio’s turn to take a crack at the champ. Call the whole thing **3/4.
Oh, and John Cena WILL…NOT…DIE!!!!