WWE Raw Results – March 21, 2011
RAW this week starts with Justin announcing JR! his music starts, the fans are thrilled, but it’s Cole dressed up like JR with a bottle of BBQ sauce (which is kick ass if you haven’t tried it), ankle brace, glasses, the hat, and much padding. He rants about how Cole broke his ankle. He gets right up in front of King, but then fled when King stood up. “You suck!” chants. Cole hid in the Cole Mine and said he can’t be touched in his fortress. It’s not about King, it’s about the Superstars. Josh talks King down. King says he’d like to punch Cole’s lights out!
Triple H’s music and he comes out to the ring sans leather jacket and sleeveless denim jacket, but water bottle in hand. Trip sprays his water as the tron plays behind him – perfect camera angles! Trip into the ring to pose in a corner as the camera pulls all the way back to show the whole arena. Another beautiful shot! The fans are hot for Trip!
Trip looks up at the WMXXVII sign. Some Taker fans aren’t as happy with Trip. He says almost 20 years in this business. A long time. Stand in this ring, walk out there, look at the fans and wonders if it’s the last time he works in this building. Two weeks is the defining moment of his career, of Taker’s career. He hears people, sees the signs. 19-0, 18-1, time to end the streak. A match like no other, two icons clashing. No holds barred. He doesn’t know what it will take out of him or Taker. Neither will be the same, he assures us of that. It’s the biggest match he’s ever been in, in his life. That streak is bigger than any Championship, bigger than all he’s held combined. Ending it will be a career defining moment. Before they go to the ring in two weeks, tear each other apart, put each other through hell, he wants Taker to do him a favor. He wants Taker to come to RAW next week. He wants to look Taker in the eye in the ring so Trip can tell him what will happen in two week at WM. He’ll look Taker in the eye and tell him he’ll lose. Trip will end the streak. The thing is, when it dies, so does Taker. If Trip can’t do it, he promises to die trying. But he wants that one last opportunity to stand face to face with his. Like his song says. ‘Ain’t no grave can hold this body down.’ When he ends this streak, that’s it. It’s done. Taker, at WM, you go 18-1. Taker, at WM, you will Rest In Peace!
Trip’s music plays, but then Ted DiBiase Jr comes out. He says last year he was a rising star in the WWE. He wrestled his first WM match against Randy Orton. Now, this year, he’s just an afterthought. He won’t be an afterthought any more. He’s making his own opportunity. What if he took out the Cerebral Assassin on live TV, two weeks before WM? Then people will have no choice but take notice of him, Ted DiBiase.
Ted up on the apron, but Trip slams into him. Trip from the ring after Ted, but then Ted got the upper hand. Backed to the barrier, but then Trip fights back. Ted head first into the stairs, then body first into the next stairs. Head first again, then Ted back first into the barrier. Trip grabs a chair. Once to the gut, then a couple shots to Ted’s back. Again Trip starts pulling the announce table apart, again. Trip pulls Ted up, lays his body on the table, then climbs as Cole tries to raise the emotion even higher. Thumb across his throat, Taker-style, then he pedigreed Ted through the table absolutely perfectly. Trip then stands, slightly posed with the WM sign over his shoulder, then he turns and looks at the sign. Trip points up at the WM sign and the fans go wilder.
Sheamus vs. Evan Bourne
Sheamus is in the ring with his new strap in hand. Evan out to face him, huge smile on his face. Cole talks about Tweeting what he can’t say on RAW. He’s Tweeting right now.
They lock up and Evan slammed down. Kicks to Sheamus, but then Evan into a corner, then slammed to the mat with a clothesline. Stomps on Evan, then forearms over Evan’s shoulder to his chest through the ropes. Sheamus stomps on Evan’s hand. Evan whipped, but moves. A kick to Sheamus’ face. Evan climbs and flies with his SSP, but Sheamus moves. Brogue kick to Evan and Sheamus pins for three.
Winner – Sheamus
Sheamus says he’s now our new Champion of the United States of America. Bryan’s music hits and he comes stomping out in ring gear and a Bryan shirt. Bryan says one of the great things about this country is everyone gets an opportunity, no matter where they’re from. He wants to invoke his rematch clause and wants to do it at WM. Sheamus throws the strap at Bryan. As Bryan catches it, he the eats a brogue kick! Sheamus backs up the ramp screaming about being the new Champion of the United States of America!
WWE Slam Of The Week – Ryan about to finish Orton last week, but Orton hit an RKO for the win, destroying what was left of Nexus. Then Orton punted Ryan’s head off and it was over.
Orton steps out of his tour bus. Scott stops Orton and asks about his bus. It’s the place to clear his head, think and take his family with him. He saw the birth of Nexus there and now he watches, over and over, the punting of Nexus. Punk thinks he’s sick and twisted, he has not idea what sick and twisted really is.
Maryse vs. Eve
Maryse in the ring in a sparkly red, silver and black two piece outfit. Eve out in gold to face her.
Maryse stops the match before it starts, flips her hair, then is ready with smack talking. Eve talks with a bitch slap to Maryse. Maryse comes back with a tackle, then pulls Eve’s hair. Eve whipped, then slammed face first into the buckle by her hair. Eve choked in the ropes, but moves out of the way of Maryse’s hip.
Cole, up on his desk wants them to end this, he has another world wide exclusive about King. Eve shoots some nastiness at Cole. Eve with her standing moonsault, but Maryse’s knees come up. Maryse screeches something, but Eve reverses Maryse’s hold and hits her finisher for three.
Winner – Eve
Cole’s very happy that’s over! Now onto real business tonight. Eve right over to the Cole Mine. One of his security boys tries to keep Eve back. She manages to get his mic. Then he orders her to get out of there, that she doesn’t want any of him. She leaves, but totally pissed off.
Heath Slater & Justin Gabriel vs. Kozlov & Santino w/ Tamina
The Corre is in the ring. Video of the Corre destroying Big Show and Kane last week on SD! They’re in the ring laughing about what they did. Kozlov, Santino and Tamina to the ring.
Bar on Santino with kicks and blows, but this a beautiful hip toss from Santino. Santino sets up for the cobra, but Slater distracts and Gabriel kicks him. Slater tags in. Slater has a chinlock on Santino who gets free, but gets caught before he can get to Kozlov. Santino kicks away from Slater and tags out.
Kozlov in and on Slater hard! Kicks and blows send Slater flying. Wade distracts Kozlov and he’s attacked from behind. Gabriel tags in and hits his 450 for three.
Winner – Slater & Gabriel
All of the Corre starts stomping Santino and Kozlov. Big Kane’s music hits and they come out to the ring. They beat the heck out of the Corre as Santino and Kozlov look a little lost. Double choke slam to Ezekiel. Kane lowers his arm and the fire erupts. Santino offers his hand. Big Show shakes hands with Santino and Kozlov.
Cena, via satellite, readies to talk next.
Video of Cena facing Alberto, but then Brodus got involved and Miz came out at Rocky to completely destroy Cena.
Cena via satellite. Josh says Rock will be live on RAW next week. What is in store for RAW next week? Cena says it will be epic. Not the time for telling jokes or promoting breakfast cereals. Next week, Cena will be face to face with Rock. If they do have a problem, it will get settled.
King asks if this focus on Rock has taken his focus off Miz, underestimated Miz? Cena says he has and he is. The fact that he’s sitting home now is proof that Miz is Champion and he can change the face of the WWE. Miz dressed as Rock was creative. He won’t be there tonight, but he’ll be watching. He hopes Miz rewrites history, but at WM Cena plans on making history.
Cole says Rock and Cena have a lot in common, but while they come via satellite, he’s there in person. Coming up next is another world wide exclusive that King won’t want to miss. Next!
Cole and Swagger are in the ring, all smiles. Swagger out to announce, facing King. Cole asks for their attention and got heat. He wants to introduce who’s training him to beat King in the main event of WM. Last week he presented us with a world wide exclusive when Brian Christopher came out and ripped on King. Cole says he was so touched by that touching family moment. Let’s revisit it. Video of Brian ripping on King in a huge way. Getting in King’s face, pushing his father.
Cole is laughing. And I quote, “Ashamed of you!” Cole says Brian was so appreciative that he sent Cole a gift. He gave Cole the Lawler family photo album. He brings this up because to know who a person’s all about, you have to see how they’re raised. Cole calls up a picture of King’s father. King’s getting more and more pissed. Cole goes on about how King could have done so much, but became a huge disappointment. Cole went to Memphis. He learned King and his father had a lot in common. Both gutless cowards and relentless bullies. He’s going to put King in his place at WM. Cole finally realized that King, his mother, his father and his son have one thing in common – the family’s nothing but a bunch of losers.
King gets to his feet, around announce and Swagger hits him. King fights back, slams Swagger onto announce, then after Cole. Cole flees. King after him comes around the ring into a clothesline. Swagger grinds King’s face into the Mine. Swagger locks on the ankle lock. Then Cole out with the ankle lock on King as Cole screams over and over for King to tap out. Swagger’s music plays at they stand over King’s body. They then celebrate and hug. Cole then points up at the WM sign as he tells Swagger that’s what it’s all about.
Cole says his emotions got the best of him. King keeps pushing his buttons and sometimes he just snaps! He sincerely apologizes for what happened.
Josh goes on about Snooki and how she’s been trending WM. Video of Snooki on RAW last week. Then Vickie came down and ripped Snooki a new one for stealing her spotlight. In the end Snooki and Trish took out Lay-Cool. Snooki on RAW was all over the media this week, bringing in the media attention that VKM had so hoped for.
Dolph w/ Vickie & Lay-Cool vs. John Morrison w/ Trish
Dolph out to the ring, Vickie and Lay-Cool in tow. Dolph poses as Vickie and Lay-Cool giggle in the ring. JoMo out with Trish. She shared his slo-mo entrance.
They lock up and spin a bit. A knee then blows to JoMo. Dolph removed from JoMo who is still on the mat. JoMo lifts Dolph and slams him back in a corner. Many blows to Dolph, but then he kicks JoMo’s knee out from under him. Neck breaker to JoMo for two. A blow to JoMo, then an elbow drop to his back for two. Chinlock on JoMo in the center of the ring. Trish gets the fans clapping. JoMo up and free. JoMo runs the ropes, slides under Dolph’s legs, then nails a drop kick on Dolph. JoMo clotheslines Dolph from the ring. Michelle up on the apron yelling at JoMo. Trish takes Layla down outside the ring, then pulls off the apron so she hits her face on the way down. Vickie tends to Dolph against announce. Trish slides into the ring to get away from Layla.
Ding-Ding! Cole leaves his Mine to go to the podium. And I quote, “I’m now ordering this match to be a Handicap Inter-gender Tag Team Match. JoMo will team with Trish against Dolph, Lay-Cool and Vickie.”
Trish reaches out through the ropes and grabs Vickie with two handfuls of Vickie’s hair. Michelle grabbed one of Vickie’s legs, Layla grabs the other. They finally free her.
Handicap Inter-Gender Tag Team Match – John Morrison & Trish vs. Dolph Ziggler & Lay-Cool (Layla & Michelle McCool) & Vickie Guerrero
Chinlock on JoMo. He elbows free, but Dolph holds the hair. JoMo kicks out. Dolph then tags out and Layla comes in. Trish in and she’s on Layla hard with forearms, then whips Layla, but runs into a foot. Trish does her hand stand on the bottom ropes as Layla tries to figure out where her head should go to make the move work. Josh calls it ‘vintage’ Trish.
Chops to Layla. Trish then licks her hand and chops Layla. Layla distracts the ref and Michelle knees Trish in the back. Michelle tags in and hits Trish with a knee to Trish’s head. Knee drops on Trish, then Michelle pins, but doesn’t get much. Trish wants to tag out, but head scissors Michelle who flies through the air beautifully.
Layla tags in and pins Trish for two. Trish slammed face first on the mat. Layla then slams Trish down backward. Dolph yells at Trish to stay down. Vickie tags in and goes for a bum drop on Trish, but Trish rolls and Vickie hurts her tushie!
JoMo tags in and meets Dolph with a couple clotheslines, then a spinning kick. Dolph face first into a corner, then kicks Dolph in the back of the head. Layla runs around the ring and slams Trish off the corner apron. This distracts JoMo enough that his starship pain is met with mat when Dolph moves out of the way. Dolph on JoMo and then hitâ€™s a zig/zag. Vickie tags in and pins JoMo for three as it’s inter-gender, not mixed tag as Cole and Josh argue.
Winner – Vickie & Lay-Cool & Dolph
The heels celebrate in the ring together.
Promo for Sin Cara.
Cole reminds us of how the show starts with Trip. He wants Taker to be on RAW next week. Josh talks about this epic encounter between Trip and Taker. WWE Superstars and Legends. Cena, Big Show, Arn, Randy Orton, Steamboat, King all talk about Trip getting Taker’s attention and didn’t have to say a word. JoMo says Trip wants to cement himself as THE icon, THE legend. JR, Stone Cold and King thinks he has to do this. Booker and Cena both say it’s the streak, Trip has to go over that. Arn talks about Taker being 18-0, like a team winning 18 Superbowls in a row, unheard of. Harley Race says at first there was thought that there was luck involved, but luck would have run out long ago. Big Show says at WM, there’s no one in the locker room as good as Taker. JR says that Taker’s career revolves around this one day. Arn says Taker owns WM. HBK says nothing lasts forever. The last two years it was this close. Taker’s hanging on by a thread. Cena says Trip has a great chance to break this streak. JR says Trip’s mindset is what set his apart from all the other victims who have fallen to Taker (not one word about Trip being one of those victims!). Trip’s record in in No Holds Barred Matches, it’s damned impressive. Arn says he doesn’t think anyone walking upright could take that streak. Orton says he was taken down by Taker and on that day he brings it. Big Show says he doesn’t think he’s been pushed the way he has been pushed by Taker. Jericho says they will both leave something they’ll never get back. Dusty says that for one of these guys, it could be the final chapter. Orton says he’ll be watching. Stone Cold says it’s bigger than the Superbowl. Jericho says this IS WM!
Randy Orton out to the ring. Video of Orton punting Husky, McGillicutty, Otunga, then Ryan. Now Punk’s alone facing Orton.
WM Rewind Match – Randy Orton vs. Rey Mysterio
Orton in the ring, waiting. Video of Orton’s comments outside his tour bus. The audio is all screwy and we can’t hear his words as his music cuts in and out. Nothing was heard of Orton’s word from earlier. Rey comes running out to his pyro as the RAW stage doesn’t have the spot to bounce up through it. Rey, in yellow, out to the ring as he stops and touches foreheads with kids on the way.
Rey around behind Orton, but then free. Orton Rey, whipping him, then kicking out of the corner. More and more kicks for Orton. A forearm from a kneeling Orton stopped Rey. Orton slid Rey face first across the ring and out. Orton out, slides Rey in and pins for two. Knee drop on Rey for two more. Chin lock on Rey on the mat. Rey elbows out, but a forearm to his back. Rey whipped, but comes out to Orton picking him up and putting him up top. Rey up top and gains enough power to send Orton reeling back. Rey off the corner onto Orton with a seated senton, but Orton was almost Â¾ of the way to the mat when Rey actually hit his chest!
Rey ducks a clothesline, but then into that sick scoop slam of Orton. Rey on the apron and is caught coming through, but he reverses through Orton’s legs and tries for 619, but Orton catches him. Orton now nails Rey with the through the ropes DDT.
It’s at the point that Punk’s voice says hello to ‘Randall’ from the tron. He’s out by his bus. Punk says Orton’s right, Punk doesn’t know what sick and twisted is. But that’s a really nice bus and he can’t wait to see Orton’s wife. Orton takes off from the ring like his ass is on fire. Orton grabs the door handle of the bus and Punk comes from behind and nails Orton with a wrench in the back of the thigh. Orton’s wife screeches until Punk tells her to shut up. Punk says he bets the voices in Orton’s head are telling Orton that he shouldn’t have punted Husky, McGillicutty, Otunga and Ryan in the head. Doesn’t look like he’ll be punting anyone at WM. Aint that a kick in the head? Punk then kicks Orton in the head as his wife watches out the window. Punk slowly blows a kiss to Orton’s wife through the window. Punk leaves and she comes out to Orton, screaming for help.
Josh says Taker’s accepted Trip’s challenge next week on RAW. And Rock will be live next week on RAW in Chicago.
In the ring A-Ri announces himself. Three weeks ago he was fired as Miz’s apprentice. Earlier this week he was rehired under a new Title, VP of Corporate Relations! He then introduces Miz as the WWE Champion and best man at A-Ri’s wedding! Miz comes out in a beautiful suit of a color that might be blue, might be gray or might even be eggplant. With it is a light pink shirt and darker pink patterned tie.
Miz says in the 1970’s people would travel great distances to gather so the could say they saw Mohammed Ali box in person. In the 1980’s people would pay outrageous prices for the thrill of watching an, in his prime, Michael Jordan play basketball. Now, in 2011 people have been blessed with the honor of watching Miz. When he first started, people didn’t take him seriously. Some said he was annoying. But now, look how far we’ve come. Now Cena, Rock and each fan hang on every word he says. The fans didn’t quite agree with this and tells Miz so. Miz smiles. Last week he imitated the Rock. It was good, got them all. It’s ironic because there’s been many wanna be Rock clones, but the one person who imitated him well is a one of a kind, an original.
He’s rewritten history. Someone with more charisma than HBK. Physically more dominant that Andre. Who is far more intelligent than Cena and Rock combined. Miz is the greatest WWE Champion in history! Huge heat from the fans. Miz says in the process he’s become bigger than the WWE Universe and everyone in it. He’s flipped the WWE since day one. And that’s what he is about to reveal, symbolizes and celebrates. He pulls a WWE mic wrapper and flips it, puts it on the mic in the form of an M. That M stands for Miz.
The time has now come. Ladies and gentlemen, it’s time to rewrite Miztory! The lights go down, one spotlight on the covered thing in the ring. Music and the fabric is pulled to show Cena’s spinner belt that’s normally locked in place when anyone but Cena has it, it’s now locked in with the WWE logo upside-down. A few fans yelled out that it’s awesome!
Cole talks about how wonderful it is! Miz holds the belt, then has A-Ri snap it on. Miz says the WWE Championship will no longer spin like a toy. He doesn’t plan on being a multi-time Champion because he doesnâ€™t ever plan on losing this Title. Because he’s the Miz – and he’s — Awesome!
Cole is thrilled, but then Cena is on the tron clapping. He tells Miz it’s so epic and moving. He hasn’t seen anything that emotion since the season finale of Flip This House. Miz took the WWE logo and turned it into an M. For Miz’s name that begins with an M. Good for you Miz. Just like Miz has beaten Cena up, the WWE Universe knows Cena isn’t invincible, he can be hurt. The WWE Universe also knows something Miz is about to find out. Don’t make Cena angry. In 13 days Cena will make history at WM! A guy comes in and starts removing things from behind Cena. At first a plant, then the sofa, then the walls. The walls behind show Pittsburgh Penguins all around. Cena says oh, no, he was supposed to be broadcasting from his home. He is, for the past 9 years the WWE has been his home! Right now you two jack wagons are in the middle of his living room and he’s coming to take out the trash! Cena drops his mic and heads for the ring as A-Ri and Miz ready themselves.
Cena’s music hits. He comes out, removes his shirt, then rushes the ring. His jorts were riding really low showing off too much of his Super Cena panties. As Cena got to the bottom of the ramp he dodged the table that Miz threw at him. Into the ring both A-Ri and Miz on Cena together with blows. Cena onto Miz, then A-Ri gets him. Onto A-Ri and Miz gets him. Cena very ungracefully tosses A-Ri off and out of the ring and Miz takes this time to flee.
A-Ri comes back in onto Cena, but ends up in an STF that Cena wouldn’t let go of. Cole talks up his buddy Cena in a huge way as he abuses A-Ri. Miz comes out to the stage, so Cena lets go of A-Ri. Miz comes out a bit, so Cena locks it back on. On and off a couple times as Miz is tormented over what to do about it all. Cena finally lets go of A-Ri to pose with the WM sign over his shoulder. Cena has some blood on his left cheek and abrasions on the bridge of his nose, high up where his uni-brow should be. RAW fades to black.
Rock & Taker on tron