Impact Wrestling Results – November 5, 2019
We start off with our usual video looking back at last week’s episode, then we go to oVe, who are drinking beer like men, not coolers like b****es. They are taking over everything.
We go right to the ring for our first match…
Moose vs Willie Mack
This should be fun. Great mix of speed and power stuff to start the match until Willie takes Moose to the floor with a flying headscissors. Moose comes back in and charges, Mack sidesteps and Moose goes to the floor, then Mack takes Moose out with a dive. Back into the ring where Moose catches Mack off guard with a corner dropkick, then a hang time version after Mack collapses to the mat. Moose rams Mack hard into the corner, nearly moving the ring. He does it a second time, and when Mack goes to the second rope, Moose counters to the Go To Hell for 2. Moose makes it to his feet and they trade right hands, Moose goes to the eyes, then they trade bicycle kicks, Mack hits a Stunner, then turns Moose inside out with a hard clothesline. Mack with a Samoan drop, kip up, and standing moonsault for 2. Mack goes to the top rope, Moose crotches him, and hits a superplex that rattles the ring. Moose hot shots Mack off the top rope and hits the spear for the win.
EXCELLENT opener! They really brought their working boots for this one.
Alisha is getting ready for her big date with Ace Austin, but she goes to freshen up and overhears Ace telling Reno Scum that he’s been banging her for weeks and now he is done with her because he’s in Eddie’s head. Alisha looks furious.
Madison Rayne and Kiera Hogan are arguing backstage, and Taya Valkyrie comes in to bicker with them. Madison says if Taya wants to they can settle it in the ring, but Taya is like a super busy person.
Jordynne Grace gets in Taya’s face and wants her title shot for pinning her last week, but Taya says she’s already booked to face Madison Rayne tonight. Ha.
Josh and Don talk about stuff, then we go back to the ring…
Michael Elgin vs Fallah Bahh
They just brawl right from the start, and both men are going toe-to-toe with their heaviest shots until Bahh catches Elgin with a kick, then slams him and hits a twisting headbutt for 2. Elgin knocks Bahh to the floor with a heavy clothesline, then comes in and hits a top rope double stomp (!!!) for 2. Elgin suplexes Bahh for 2 as we go to commercial.
We’re back, and Elgin is still in control. Bahh starts to fire up, lucha rolls past Elgin, but Elgin gets ahold of Bahh and hits a t-bone suplex. Bahh’s second comeback has a bit more teeth as he goes through Elgin with a hard clothesline, squashes him with a vertical splash, but only gets 2. Elgin unloads a series of hard strikes and hits a very impressive release German suplex. Elgin with a Death Valley driver for 1, Bahh with a Samoan drop, Elgin rolls to the corner, Bahh with the Yokozuna avalanche, and he hits a sitout Tombstone for 2. Elgin puts Bahh on the top rope, and yanks his arm down over the top rope, then comes off the second rope with a stomp to Bahh’s arm. Elgin with a schoolboy rollup into a Crippler Crossface to force Bahh to tap.
Winner: Michael Elgin
We’re 2 for 2 tonight! Another great, hard-hitting and competitive match.
Ace Austin finds Alisha backstage and asks if she’s ready for tonight. Alisha suggests they skip dinner, she sticks a keycard in his shirt pocket, and says they should just head back to her room. She walks off and Ace looks pleasantly surprised.
oVe arrives at the arena and they’re still partying, and they get in Tommy Dreamer’s face and call him fat.
The Impact+ Moment Of The Week is upon us, as Moose defends the Grand Championship against Naomichi Marufuji from a few years ago.
The North knows either of them could be the X Division or World Champion, but they decided as a team to be the best tag team, so their open challenges are as teams, so they want Marufuji to find a tag partner, and they’ll put the title on the line because that’s how confident they are.
Ken Shamrock vs Joey Ryan
Joey oils himself up and goes for a handshake, but Shamrock high fives him instead. Very slow feeling out process, and Shamrock gets a couple of armdrags. Shamrock gets the anklelock, but Joey quickly goes to the ropes. Ryan with a PERFECT dropkick to Ken Shamrock, who seems a bit caught off guard by that one. Shamrock goes for a handshake, but Ryan pulls Shamrock’s hand onto his ding ding, which holds his hand captive, and he tosses him with his ding ding. Now Shamrock is pissed, and he’s IN THE ZONE! He quickly takes Joey down and taps him out to the anklelock.
Winner: Ken Shamrock
Very psychology heavy match, and I enjoyed it.
oVe is backstage getting drunk and rowdy, and Jake makes fun of Daga while wearing his jacket. Daga comes in and gets in Jake’s face until get gets his jacket back. Sami takes a big sip from his beer, spits in it, and hands it out to Daga. They get in each other’s faces until Rich Swann comes to separate them. Sami says they’re going to keep this party going.
Taya Valkyrie vs Madison Rayne
I don’t believe this is a title match. Madison’s beatend Taya like 35 times but I guess we’re going to ignore that for the moment. Taya with the early advantage, and hangs onto it with a length offensive against Madison. Madison begins to mount a comeback as we go to commercial.
We’re back, and Josh confirms that the title indeed is not on the line tonight. Taya is just furiously pounding on Madison, who starts to fire back. Taya counters a bulldog attempt to a sitout powerbomb for 2. Taya with an alarm clock kneestrike for 2. Madison counters Road to Valhalla to a victory roll for 2, then hits the ripcord cutter and makes a cover, but John E. Bravo throws Hennigan into the ring to distract everyone, and allows Taya to roll Madison and drill her in the face with a kneestrike before hitting Road to Valhalla for the win.
Winner: Taya Valkyrie
Match was okay. Jordynne Grace chases Taya off.
The Great Gama is backstage reaming the Desi Hit Squad for always losing, and says Mahabali Shera went home to India on a pilgrimage. Instead, he introduces his new protege whose name I didn’t catch, and says if he proves himself, one of them will be gone.
Ace Austin arrives wherever his date with Alisha is…with his title belt, of course.
Rosemary is backstage ranting at “Susie” who claims to have no memory of putting Rosemary in a coffin for over a year or murdering her best friend. Susie walks off obliviously, and finds Jessicka Havok, and asks if they know each other. She doesn’t think so, and walks off.
Petey Williams vs Bhupinder Singh
Bhupinder is the other Desi guy whose name I didn’t catch earlier. Petey outmaneuvers Singh and hits a flying headscissors that sends him to the floor. Petey goes for the slingshot headscissors, but Sigh powerbombs Petey onto the apron. Back into the ring, where Singhhits a slam, legdrop, and kneedrop, then an elbowdrop for 2. Singh hits a swinging uranage for 2, then a powerslam for another 2. Petey turns it around out of nowhere and taps Singh out to the Sharpshooter.
Winner: Petey Williams
Match was okay. Nice to see Petey. Singh goes after the referee, who I just realized has no legs, but Petey comes in and sets Singh up so the referee can hit a 619, then hits a Canadian Destroyer to set the referee up to come off the top with a 450 splash. Okay, interesting way to book a referee.
Alisha Edwards welcomes Ace into her room, and he tells him to make himself comfortable while she does the same. Ace hurries to get undressed and lays on the bed with his belt draped over him and wearing a blindfold she thoughtfully provided him with. We all know where this is going, right? Eddie Edwards comes over and strokes his face, and Ace takes the blindfold off to see it’s him. Eddie begins attacking Ace and goes to swing Kenny at him, but Alisha stops him…then takes the stick and chases him down the hall. She stands on his groin and prepares for the deathblow when Eddie comes in, grabs the stick…and then they start madly making out and rolling around on the floor. Whatever floats your boat. Eddie nearly makes me fall out of my chair when he grabs Kenny to make it a three way. Yes, really.
Johnny Swinger is backstage telling Petey to be his young boy and carry his bags, and Swinger says he needs to pay his dues. Petey asks if Swinger knows who he is when oVe comes through, and tells Swinger he looks like a mark.
Josh and Don talk about stuff, then the oVe party finally makes its way out to the arena, and we’ll catch up with them after this last break.
Sami makes Jake introduce him with superlatives to rival Apollo Creed himself, then Sami tells everyone to stand up and show the champ some respect. Sami told us from day one that Sami Callihan would walk out of Bound For Glory with the Impact World Title. Tommy Dreamer comes out and he seems to have some thoughts to share. Dreamer calls Sami a bully and an internet troll, then a stupid SOB. Sami responds by calling him Fat Dreamer, and says if he has a problem with oVe, to drag his fat ass into the ring and do something about it. Dreamer says we’re in front of a bunch of Canadian freaks, and wants an extreme celebration. (This is quickly turning into the craziest promo ever. Anyway, out comes Rich Swann, Daga, and Tessa Blanchard to even the odds. A brawl breaks out, the referee rings the bell, and looks like we have an impromptu main event…
oVe vs Tommy Dreamer, Rich Swann, Daga & Tessa Blanchard
The brawl spills all over ringside and we wind up with Tommy Dreamer and Jake Crist going at it. Tommy hangs Jake in the Tree of Woe, Tessa holds a chair in his face, and Tommy baseball slides it. Tommy bionic elbows Dave Crist to the floor, bites Jake, then Madman Fulton comes in and just plows Dreamer into the mat before hitting the swinging Flatliner. Fulton catches Daga coming off the top rope, but Daga catches him with a swinging DDT and a dropkick. Daga with a missile dropkick to drive Fulton to the floor. Sami dumps Daga to the floor, and now it’s down to Swann and Sami. Swann with a couple of flying headscissors and a dropkick, but Sami bowls him out to the floor before coming face to face with Tessa. They trade shots, Tessa hits an Ace Crusher, then she takes out everyone on the floor, friend and foe. Daga takes out most of oVe with a twisting senton to the floor, Tessa stares down Jake, then Sami nails her from behind, Swann takes Sami and Jake out with a double Ace Crusher, then rolls Sami up for the win.
Winners: Tommy Dreamer, Rich Swann, Daga & Tessa Blanchard
Well, this seems to have ruined the celebration. Babyfaces celebrate to close the show.